Starting to say "Daddy"

Starting to say "Daddy"

by Joel Howard

I'm starting to call you Daddy

Starting to call you Friend

Not much else comes out

Not much here within

That encapsulates my fury

That encapsulates my fright

That I need to say, than Daddy

Then it all is alright

I'm starting to feel the weakness

Of constant childlike faith

I'm starting to feel much smaller

And feel that is okay

I'm starting to wear a smile

Underneath all my pain

For somehow in the messiness

I know You're leading me

I'm starting to just omit

Coming with my list of gains

Starting to feel more limited

And feel that is okay

Can You be here my Daddy?

Can You please help me quit

All of my pretending

All this guilt within

For not being someone I think

You think that I should be

When Daddy means I'm lovely

Even when I'm messy?

Even when I can't handle

One more drop of pain

One more drop from tearstained

Eyelids here within

My pain is like a heart

Throbbing deep within my soul

I'm desperate for You Lord

I'm desperate, I know

I need You more each hour

I need You more each day

And when I call you Daddy

I feel that is okay

So let me call You Daddy

From now on

From this day..

O let me call you Daddy

O Daddy here with me